Day 5.

I often wonder what life would be like if Chase was still here. Would he be walking by now, how many teeth would he have, would he be saying momma and dada. Life is crazy how things can happen so fast. No matter how many times I ask God why, I will never get a legit answer from him. There is time I just want to get on my blog and write all day, but I can't. Depression is real and the thoughts of my baby being gone constantly run through my mind. Life is different, will I ever accept it you ask, maybe in the future but not right now. My nights are long, my mind never stops wondering. Chase, please know momma loves you and there is not a day that goes by that I don't think of you. I hope you can forgive me one day and please know I did everything I thought was right to help you, if I could just go back in time and redo things over again I will.